Archive for July, 2013

Whose Ready to Party?

Lydia’s ANC came up from 470 to 740 overnight!!!  Doctors are expecting her to be over 1,000 tomorrow.  When she holds over 1,000 for three days they will take her off her final meds and prepare to be discharged from the hospital!!!  Wahoo!!! This is exciting news.  They will discharge us to stay locally for approximately 55 days but even then we could return home sooner.  We will continue to press in and walk in the Lord’s report.

Looking to be release next week!!!  Then we will prepare for the return of Abigail, Josiah, Selah, and Charis.  Can you say P-A-R-T-Y?!!!  Whose ready?

To be released:

1. Lydia’s counts have to be over 1,000 for a consecutive 3 days.

2. She has eat and drink on her own.

3. No infections.

She got to go to the children’s play area on down time today for an hour.  Down time is when it is closed to everyone else.  She got it all to herself.

They have taken her off 3 meds today!!! Wahoo!!!

We are still looking for local housing but have a strong possible lead.  We can stay in a hotel until we are reunited with our children.  Our trouble with housing is that we have to stay longer than 2 weeks and less than 6 months.  Short term will only book you for 2 weeks and long term won’t book you for less than 6 months.  BUT GOD has the perfect place for us and we will leave it in His hands.

Give the Lord a shout for His mercies are new every morning!




Read Full Post »

I had one-of-those kind of moments. I am sure the new mom thought I was crazy since their was no alcohol for her to smell.  I always thought this verse was a little odd but I know have a way to relate it to my own life.

Acts 2:12-15

So they were all amazed and perplexed, saying to one another, “Whatever could this mean?”  Others mockingly said, “They are full of new wine.” But Peter standing up with the eleven, raised his voice and said, “Men of Judea and all who dwell in Jerusalem, let this be known to you and heed my words. “For these are not drunk, as you suppose, since it is only the third hour of the day.”

Earlier that day Lydia looked at Scott and I and asked for crab legs.  So we would get crab legs.  It was the first thing she had asked to eat in 3 weeks.

While I was waiting for the Carryout order a new mom and her 6 month old were there with other family.  I couldn’t resist asking to hold the baby, it had pricked my heart and I could help but think of all I have missed with my own children.  Charis would no longer be a baby when we get her back.

In an effort to prove that I was legit and not a lunatic off the street I took my most resent picture of all 5 of my children.  As soon as I opened my mouth tears, big tears rolled down my cheeks.  Not just one or two tears feel but Niagara Falls was now in Outback.  My voice caught in my throat and cut out as I explained that my 7 year old daughter was in the hospital having just received a bone marrow transplant.  I couldn’t get the words out clearly so I held up the picture of my children and fumbled again through the words as I shared the other children have been away in Iowa at my parents house for 7 weeks and I wouldn’t see them for another 3.

I knew it was hopeless, I wouldn’t even let me hold the baby when I appear to be drunk, out of my mind, and not able to put two thoughts together.   My pleading eyes just yielded to the inevitable.  The new mom with her mom were speechless. All I wanted was to hold the baby and give of the love that was about to burst out of me for my own children.  But they are not here for me to pour my love upon.

“Sometimes the mind does things that the heart can’t explain.” (Princess Diaries 2)

What was I thinking…I wasn’t drunk and I wasn’t crazy I just had a “moment” of reality.  I was missing my Abigail, Josiah, Selah and Charis.  I was missing our weekly family nights piled together in our blankets and pillows on the floor for a movie night.  I was missing holding each one, speaking words of encouragement, cooking and cleaning with them, their smiles and laughs.  I was missing being a family.  Momma was needing to cuddle and speak life over the baby.

I couldn’t have asked for a better situation for my children than to be with Grandparents and in a community that would welcome them.  My parents have been…courageous, generous, outstanding, unbelievable in their support, and totally selfless.  Their whole routine is out of sorts but still they make the sacrifice and continue to give into Abigail, Josiah, Selah, and Charis.  They call nearly everyday with a verse to encourage us.

My Mom tells me every time they come to visit, “We don’t know how you do it with 5 children, homeschooling, writing books, keeping the house, cooking and everything else.”  Well, I have to return the question…I don’t know how they have done it.  We knew it would be the best solution for the children because of all their community has to offer and the children would not be shuffled around or feel shunned while we tend to Lydia.  The children have all made friends through City League ball, at the pool and library, VBS, park time, and visiting with farm animals.  Brittany, my niece, was a tremendous help in June.  Courtney had some big shoes to fill when Brittany went to her next job.  And she rose to the challenge marvelously!  She makes sure they are up for breakfast and out the door in the morning for playtime.  Truly my parents have been blessed.  But still, when you have lived on your own schedule for so long and then have an invasion of 4 children that can be overwhelming.  You never realize how much stuff collects daily!  All the clothes, towels, toys, books, sharing the TV, and dirt deposits everywhere.  And you can’t count how many times the door opens and closes in a day.  Thankfully I didn’t have 4 at one time.  We were able to get in a family rhythm before adding the next one.  Very different situation.

10 Weeks is too long and this Mommy didn’t realize how much I yearned to hold each one of my children and have them talking all at the same time to tell me all they have done.  No, I was not drunk like you suppose but love sick.  August 10th can’t get here fast enough and if God wanted to do another miracle by getting us out of the hospital so we could be a part of the Lee Family Vacation I wouldn’t stop Him.  To hold and listen to my children a week early would be…I don’t know that I have the words.  My heart just might explode.

My eyes pleading, my hands holding the picture I could no longer see because of the tears, and my mind trying to complete the sentence I just started…I stopped.  The new mom paused, I am sure not knowing what to do with me and my request, “He has been sick so I don’t think you should hold him but you can talk to him.”  She followed me over to her husband holding the baby.  I spoke and the baby smiled so big as his eyes sparkled.  Oh, the joy was uncontainable.  I miss the sparkle in the eyes of my children, their bouncing smiles, and contagious laughter.  Thank you Jesus for the moment.

I will trust You, my God, all day long.  My cup of joy runs over for You are so very good to me!!!  Yo know what is best and I thank you for the awesome opportunity of being  a Mom to Abigail, Josiah, Lydia, Selah, and Charis. We rejoice in Lydia’s counts on the rise and her zeal for life returning.  We thank you that the doctors have said she is ahead of schedule.  Only You, my God, have been our strength and steadfast assurance as we walk through the fire.  We will be called out and promoted as Shadrach, Meshach, and Abed-Nego and all will know that You are the only true God to be trusted with our life.  You have  designed us with a destiny of doing great exploits with You.

Rejoicing in the Moments of His love,


Read Full Post »

Hello friends!

I am unable to do the appropriate marketing for The Launching Pad: a 21-day prayer strategy that came out January 22nd.  Lydia was diagnoses with Leukemia January 24th.  My focus needs to be on my family right now.  But as well all know, word-of-mouth is the best seller of anything.  Many of you have written private messages to tell me how powerful this book has been to you, but would you mind taking it a step further?  Will you help me out by taking about 5 to 10 minutes to write an endorsement?

Please go to 3 places:

1. Amazon.com easier to find if you search by my name

2. Barnesandnoble.com easier to find if you search by my name

3. facebook go to The Launching Pad page. (a space between each word in the title when searching on fb.  Please leave a endorsement and click “like

You can write one endorsement and cut and past on all three places.  The comment should include how this book affect your life and how you think it will encourage another.  You can include who “needs” to read the book.  Think about what you learned from the book or how it encouraged you.  Write it as if you were telling your best friend.  Should be between 5 and 7 sentences.

Another option would be to quote your favorite chapter and post on your blog, twitter, or fb.  Be sure to include title and Veridee Hand.  You may use the video promo on the fb page to add to your blog or fb page.

When you buy the paperback it comes with a free downloadable audio version.  However, it comes as an ebook as well.

Thank you for your time and endorsement for The Launching Pad.  I am honored to have the opportunity to share my walk with Christ that has launched you and I into our destiny.

In His Presence We are Made Strong,

Veridee Hand

Read Full Post »

A Whole New Level

By Sunday night our unit was almost packed with new arrivals.  Some scheduled and others from the ER.  Things were a whirl as the nurses were getting everyone into their room and situated.  Obviously in the situation we are walking through, I look differently upon the faces of new arrivals.  Parents not being able to control the storm they have entered as the waiting begins and the children as little confused, not sure what all the fuss is about but knowing this isn’t the usual visit to the doctor.

We were also part of the hustle and bustle.  We had been in our room for two weeks so it was time to move to another room.  This is standard policy for transplant patients to prevent sickness.  This is the only time Lydia can get out of her room.  Other than that, it has been over 2 weeks since she has been able to leave her room.  Going into this I didn’t know how I would be able to stay in the room for a month.  We had come accustom to going to the children’s play area every time the doors opened during our last stay (21 days).  But not this time.  Until her ANC comes up to indicate that her immune system has been revived she cannot go.  Thankfully, they restock her with new art projects.  After we changed rooms we set up her isle and the painting began!  Absolutely beautiful ornate sunset with orange, pink, purple and blue lighting up the sky and through the trees with a river flowing and a stepping stone path to cross.

But that night the unit took on a different atmosphere.  Parents were worried and exhausted.  Children wanting to be well enough to leave, to return home to their bed and toys and comforts.  While doing laundry, I had many trips through the unit.  We had been moved into a room that I had to walk the entire unit every time I left.  One hall going out and another when I returned. Each time, someone different would look as I passed their room and I would see the pain, the anguish, the uncertainty.  There entire posture heavy with bewilderment.

My heart cried out, “God, meet them right now, right where they are at, pour out your love that casts out ALL fear, release the virtue of Christ in me to them just like Jesus released virtue to the ones who touched Him and power came out of Him and healed them.”  I knew I didn’t have anything but Jesus that would calm the storm they were in.  I had no idea what was running through their mind but Jesus did and He could settle it with His love. 1 John 4:18 says ‘There is no fear in love, but perfect love casts out fear, because fear involves torment.  But he who fears has not been made perfect in love.’ Where fear abounds the torment is great.  Years ago I learned that if I was in fear over ANYTHING I did not have His perfect love in that situation.  When I do not trust God my doubt, my unbelief is like an umbrella that keeps the rain of His love from touching me.  So I take down the umbrella that was my mode of self protection and let the rain hit me and dance in the puddles of His love.

Then Monday night it was like there was a full moon.  Every time the night nurse came in I could sense a wave coming and a pull from the atmosphere in our room.  It would be similar to the water being pulled back into the ocean before the tsunami arrived.  I had continued releasing prayers of God’s love and comfort throughout the day when I passed the rooms but I hadn’t been out of the room very much.  The last time through the unit the nurses were a whirl as nearly every room was occupied. The intensity of things was causing stress.  Stress causes us to grasp at anything and that is never good.  A few hours later when snuggling with Lydia for bed our nurse was rushing in to take care of Lydia and then dashed out to take care of another.  Every time she opened the door it was as if I would see the tsunami coming.  As Lydia drifted off to sleep I held her close and in an attitude of ‘Not on My Watch’, I prayed but this time not just for God’s love for the parents and children but it was time to go to battle.  If I didn’t stand this would overtake us as well.  No hospital door would hold back what was coming.

Atmosphere changes and we have all seen it happen.  You could be having a completely wonderful day and then someone grips you out or a car cuts you off and poof, your wonderful day is gone…UNLESS you know how to hold your ground.  It was time to take it to a whole new level.

Standing at the threshold of the tsunami, I held high the standard of Jesus Christ and declared the power of God to send the tsunami back to where it came from.  Lydia had already lost her ANC count from Sunday to Monday but no more, not tonight…she would not be afflicted with anything else.  I would stand and fight but this time it would not be good enough to pray only for Lydia with the tsunami coming.  We either all make it out or we all go under.  The atmosphere of the unit was already in a full uproar.  All the nurses had been called to help with one child.  To just pray for Lydia would not have been enough to keep what was going on “out there” from affecting us “in here”.

I prayed for each parent and child to be at peace and sleep in the presence of God.  I prayed God would speak to them in their dreams and hope would be restored.  I prayed for each child to be held by the love of God and peace to overtake whatever turmoil that was raging in their body.  I prayed for the nurses to keep calm and operate with supernatural knowledge of what to give each child.  It is so easy in this environment to just give the child something whether they truly need it or not.  Some of it is just so the parent knows you are doing ‘something’.  I prayed for each child to receive a healing touch of God and live the fullness of all God offered them.  Releasing Jesus Turned the Tide and the natural flow of the tsunami had been reversed as I then prayed the same for everyone on our floor and then the entire hospital.  The power of God was refreshing and easy.  There was no “work” to it, no conjuring up something but just releasing what God already wanted to do.

The establishment of God’s plan led to no less than 5 being released from our unit the next day and at least one from the floor above us (Graham, who was in for a heart problem), three more from our unit the following day and another (Jake) being released today!  God is so very good!

Monday Lydia was retested for the fungal stuff and she is clear!!!  Tuesday she was tested for sinus infection and was clear!!!  Super huge because without her immune system in tack God has risen up His standard and she continues to be protected by the blood of Jesus.

Last night when walking Scott to the parking garage I decided to do the wellness walk path laid out by the hospital.  It doesn’t matter that I am eating less in the hospital if I can’t get active the pounds will continue to pile on.  It was late and I was taking a chance of being followed by security but it was time to get moving.  During the walk prayers began and I remembered being trained years ago about doing prayer walks around my house, neighborhood, and city.  I never thought I would being doing a “prayer walk” in a hospital.  Now there is a greater reason to do the wellness walk through nearly 10 connected hospital buildings. Not just for my personal wellness but to release the healing power of God to the patients and supernatural knowledge to the doctors and nurses so patients are getting exactly what they need and not just a person’s best educated guess.  This truly is taking it to a whole new level!

We continue to pray for the engraftment of the bone marrow, the perfect connection.  The only indicator that this is taking place is the ANC counts.  She had 10 on Sunday and none since then but God is doing a new thing in Lydia’s body.  At the end of 6 weeks they will take a bone marrow aspiration to verify engraftment.

Thus says the LORD, who makes a way in the sea and a path through the might waters…Behold I will do a new thing,  Now it shall spring forth; shall you not know it?  I will even make a road in the wilderness and rivers in the desert.  This people, the Hands, I have formed for Myself; they shall declare My praise.” Isaiah 43: 16, 19, and 21

We wait in great anticipation of the new thing God is doing in Lydia’s body!  And in the meantime we are taking the land where our feet trod as Joshua and the children of Israel did!

A Whole New Level Baby!



Read Full Post »

So incredibly thankful my husband encouraged me to take the opportunity to get a good nights sleep Friday night.  It was the first time since we came to the hospital that I had been away at night.  Lydia was reluctant to let me go but Scott had made a good point.  He would not be back until next week some time and I had not gotten a good night sleep in 12 days so night 13 I slept from 11pm to 10 am!  WOW what a rest!

However, Scott and Lydia did not fare so well.  They had been up every two hours with Lydia throwing up and running to the potty.  SO thankful to have a night off and be able to rest cradled in the arms of my God.  Saturday morning was nearly gone when I emerged.

About 7:45pm, Lydia was able to take a bit of a tator tot and keep it down!  First bit of food in over a week.

At 8pm they started Lydia on a new medicine for “just-in-case” she has something that they don’t know for sure what it is.  As usual the meds have all kinds of horrible side affects!  Scott and I prayed for her body to reject all side affects and the med to do only good to her body.  We declared over her body that if anything working against her goes into her body it will by no means harm her (Mark 16:14-120).

Then about 9pm she started throwing up.  However, she was so tired I got behind her as she sat up in bed with the bucket on her lap and let her rest on me between convoltions.  I put my hand on her tummy and remembered how in Mark 4: 35-40, that Jesus was able to sleep in the midst of a great storm.  All the disciples in boat were bailing water but not faster than the waves were filling the boat and Jesus is asleep at the stern.  They could all see Jesus sleeping.  I began praying in my mind, “Peace be still!” to the storm in Lydia’s body and for her to have the same supernatural sleep Jesus had in the boat at the time of the storm.

There are two things that I have learned from the Mark 4 testament: When the storm comes “after” God has said you are going to the other side you have two choices and it is not to bail water just prolonging an inevitable death as the disciples thought but we are to respond like Jesus:

1. Lay down and rest in supernatural sleep knowing God is getting you to the other side because He said that is where you are going


2. Speak to the storm with supernatural faith, “Peace, be still”

Tapping into the promise that we are walking in the fire with the Son of God (Daniel 3) We have our promise of getting to the other side as Jesus and the disciples did.  Lydia fell asleep cradled into my body just before midnight and I knew the tables had been turned.  I held her for a long while thanking Jesus.  She slept through the night and so did I.  I woke up as the nurse was printing Lydia’s blood count numbers.  She brought them in and after scanning them my hope was ignited by reality!  Lydia has an ANC of 10!!!!  She has not had an ANC for 2 weeks.  ANC is a count of a certain part of the white blood cells.  This is the main number they look at to see how she is doing.

When ANC is 1,000 she gets to get out of her room!  And when it is over 1,500 we get to be united as a family!!!

It is not a lot but it is something and we will celebrate those 10 wonderful points!!!

It is 7:37am and Lydia is still sleeping!!! supernatural?  You bet!!!


Read Full Post »

Blessings Overflow!!!

I totally believe in recognizing when we are blessed.  It was something I had to practice.  Years ago I couldn’t recognize God’s hand of blessing upon my life because I lumped everything together.  If the day wasn’t perfect from beginning to end then there was no reason to celebrate.  Then God worked-me-over to change my attitude.  He met my “hard-head” and in a tender but firm voice He spoke very clear, “You ask to see Me just like the Pharisees asked My Son for a sign from heaven.  You aren’t going to see Me if you can’t recognize what I am doing in your life.  My Son did only what He saw Me doing.  I want you to join me but you are going to have to start with recognizing Me in your day.”

That was huge!!! I began asking the Lord to open my eyes that I could see Him in my life and throughout my day.  I asked My God to open my ears because I didn’t want to be lead like a horse that had to be kicked in the side to get me moving and I didn’t want a bit in my mouth to be yanked upon when I needed to turn aside or stop.

Luke 11:9-10 “So I say to you, ask and it twill be given to you; seek and you will find; knock, and it will be opened to you.  For everyone who asks receives, and he who seeks finds, and to him who knocks it will be opened”

Since the Bible said to ask I figured I would ask.  I asked to see God high and lifted up, working things in my life for my good (Romans 8:28 And we know that all things work together for good to those who love God, to those who are the called according to His purpose.).

In Daniel 11:32b, ‘but the people who know their God shall be strong, and carry out great exploits.’  I began to seek God because I wanted to find Him and know Him so I would be faithful in my following of His good, perfect and acceptable will.

In the beginning is was so hard to see God at work because there was so much of me in the way.  I knocked, asking God to show me His ways, I knocked asking God to pour His perfect love into my life that would cast out all fear (1 john 4:18), I knocked again and asked God to turn His face toward me and bless me indeed.  I no longer wanted to live life causing others pain  (the prayer of Jabez, 1 Chronicles 4:9-10) nor living with less than what God had given me opportunity to advance His kingdom (Matthew 10:7-8).

When I positioned myself to ask, seek and knock I began seeing God at work all around me.  When I recognized what He was doing currently I saw where He had been working in my past and could believe the best for my future.  When I knocked I didn’t leave, I waited until God opened the door and I entered into His presence.

In all God has revealed, one thing is seriously true…If we cannot see God in the little things we will not give Him credit for the big things He has done.  So I have made it a practice in my life to recognize where God is at work and celebrate the little things.  Then it is easy to see Him do the big things!

Today, we celebrate God because we were blessed in so many ways!

1. Lydia woke up early to be ready for her “new birth” as they put the cord blood into her. We will never forget the day God provided EXACTLY what she needed to be completely healed!!!
2. It only took 2 hours for Lydia to recover after the transplant induction. Two of the nurses said she was doing extremely well. They are amazed! But that is because they expect the worst.  Sadly, they are trained to spot the worst responses so they stand amazed today as they saw the best of what God did in Lydia’s recovery process.  The grafting takes about 4 to 6 weeks. At that time they will do another bone marrow aspiration to identify that the cord blood grafted.

“Then the nations which are left all around you shall know that I , the LORD, have rebuilt the ruined places and planted what was desolate. I, the LORD, have spoken it, and I will do it.”  Thus says the Lord GOD: “I will also let he house of Scott Hand inquire of ME to do this for them…”  Ezekiel 36:36-37

3. I cannot stress enough how important it is to believe for the best for your family members or friends who are sick or hospitalized. Every time Lydia gets visitors she comes alive. When people feel like they matter to you then they have a better chance of recovering fast and completely. Don’t wait for the pastor to do what you should be doing. If they are your friend or your family member then you make sure they know without a shadow of a doubt that you care because you took the time to brighten their day with a card or a visit. And don’t just sit there when you go to visit, play games or take their favorite music or the latest movie that they would want to see. I am just sayin’…God will use you if you will go and do. But don’t give up!  I am so thankful for the many friends old and new God has put in Lydia’s life that have reached out to us in so many ways.  The Bible says that the blessings of God will overtake you.  Through people we have been overtaken with the blessings of God.

And whatever you do in word or deed, do all in the name of the Lord Jesus, giving thanks to God the Father through Him.  Colossians 3:17

4. I met a woman a month ago and tonight she brought her daughter up to play with Lydia, helped me in how to find housing locally for our out of the hospital but local 2 month stay in Charleston, and when I went to help Lydia she called and made reservations so I could take Scott out for his birthday!

Wow! God really showed out today with all the people that have demonstrated His love to us! PRAYER WARRIORS…THANK YOU!!! We stand united through the completion of Lydia’s healing and the grafting of this cord blood to bring abundant life to her body.

Thank you God and thank you friends for your willingness to demonstrate the characteristics of Christ. Each one of you made a sacrifice to make this day so very blessed!

We stand together to see the fullness of all God is doing in Lydia’s body to complete what He has started in her.  We bless her body to receive the bone marrow.  We bless the cord blood to be pure and graft to her body.

Celebrating Today’s Acts of God,


Read Full Post »

I really don’t care for tests. In school I would get a brain freeze when given a test.  My mom would diligently prepare me, but when I got into my chair and the test was before me it was like my mind was erased.  It was a horrible feeling to sit in the chair and know that just hours before I could answer every question but now, when it counted, I couldn’t remember.

In life we never know when we are going to be tested on the faith we have.  I have said a number of times in our To Be Like Him class that you never “really” know where you truly stand in your belief of God to act on your behalf until reality happens…the test.  We can say we believe God has all the power to work things out for our good and we can even say that God’s love will never fail but until you have been tested you never really know if you really believe what you say to believe.

This week, in the hospital with Lydia going through 3 days of radiation 2 times a day followed by 2 days of chemo that would burn her body if you didn’t wash her every six hours and then a final wipe with another chemo that has extreme side affects, the minor side affect is throwing up regularly, coupled with ATGAM.

In the middle the two day every 6 hour wash Scott was able to stay with Lydia so I had 5 hours to myself.  We were 5 days into this test and I was on the verge of failure.  I needed some personal God-time.  It wasn’t enough to be strengthened by former words of encouragement, Scriptures that got us through the last test, and with all the commotion in the hospital I couldn’t get into worship.  I needed to be in my Daddy’s presence.  I needed a fresh Word for myself.  Sometimes you are the only one who can go and get what you need from the Father because you need the strength that comes from being in His presence.

I am so grateful and have been incredibly encouraged by all the scriptures friends have sent but this was a test I had to take on my own, it was not a collective test but it would be open book.  So I opened my Bible but nothing stood out.  In the weariness of the moment I closed my Bible and opened another book, my heart.

I confessed that I fell short.  I was looking forward to going to CO because then all of my children would be together right now, this day.  I was missing my children and the togetherness that has been a solid core of strength.  I was discouraged that we hadn’t been able to find a reasonable place to rent down here when it would have been free for all of us to live together in CO. I am so thankful to have been distracted by the possibility of going to CO and the promises I was reminded of during the chase have been life-giving.  I know Lydia will not be harmed by the chemo and radiation.  She will have no side affects, no future cancer in her body from the radiation or chemo because of the promise He gave to her from Daniel 3.  I confessed I didn’t have the faith of Abraham who obeyed immediately when God told him to offer his son as a sacrifice.  In my journal I put before God, “How did Abraham wholeheartedly go about sacrificing Isaac?  He must have trust God like no other.  I was failing because I didn’t have that level of trust.  How could he be fully intending to sacrifice Isaac so that he passed the test of his heart toward God yet profess that God would provide the sacrifice?  God had told him to sacrifice Isaac.  So how did he pass the test by telling Isaac that God would provide the sacrifice?  I waited on the Lord to respond.  My faith was being tested and it “seemed” I wasn’t passing.  I just didn’t feel like I had “that” level of faith.  In the silence I took a 4 hour nap.  Just because God didn’t speak to my mind doesn’t mean that He didn’t plant something in me as I slept.  Have you ever woke up and felt like something good was going to happen, or that all the strain from the day had just been wiped.  That was what God did when I slept.

The night we checked into the hospital, June 30, my husband preached from James 1 encouraging us to keep our perspective on the prize at the end of the race.  We have to keep our perspective on counting it all joy in the midst of the test because we have already been given an A if we take, finish and turn in the test.  Jesus got the A for us.  James 1: 2-3 My brethren, count it all joy when you fall into various trials, knowing that the testing of your faith produces patience.

Lydia and I have been listening to a particular podcast by Bill Johnson three times this week and he defined patience as being the independent, unyielding defiant perseverance in the face of aggressive misfortune thus to a kind of courageousness.  WOW!!!  Now that is a Selah!  And it spoke directly to me.

Saturday night I was needing to know how many days Abraham and Isaac traveled to the place where God tells Abraham to sacrifice Isaac.  The ATGAM was scheduled for 3 days and that night after the first dose was complete Lydia’s temperature spiked. It causes her body to think is was being overtaken with sickness and amplifies the allergic reaction symptoms.  Therefore, she has a rash from the top of her head all the way down her legs, whelps, swollen face, ear lobes and lips and hard to swallow.  Taking place within 30 minutes.  Way out of control.  I was not believing this was symptoms of an allergic reaction.  No, she was having an allergic reaction.

I was wondering if the journey was 3 days. However, I was astonished to find that the story is in Genesis 22.  Now verse 2 is what rocks my world and a tear trickles down my face…what do you mean by this God?  (You see, 222 is a number God had used to speak to me in the past and I didn’t care for this one.)  “Then He said, “Take now your son, your only son Isaac, whom you love and go to the land of Moriah, and offer him there as a burnt offering on one of the mountains of which I shall tell you.”  Lydia is not my only so what does this mean?  However, I totally feel like I am offering Lydia as a sacrifice because I have no control over the amount of chemo, the type of chemo, or when it should all stop.  I have prayed for her destiny from my womb.  It has been difficult to trust the medical world because I know she is healed from Leukemia but I struggled with all the side affects that every chemo they give her has documentation that it either causes a tumor or another form of cancer later on.  Which is why they do not release her until she turns 30.  Causing 10 other cancers when this is not 100% cure doesn’t seem like good odds to me.  So I have to trust God’s complete promise.

I confessed to my friend that I didn’t know if I could offer up Lydia, she responded, “You already have when you prayed for the will of God to be done here on earth as it is in heaven.”

Two things from Genesis 22:

1. The place was marked with a new name, The-Lord-Will-Provide.  I had no idea how this would fit in to what we were going through.  I didn’t see how I needed God has my provider.  I needed God as Lydia’s healer.

2. God blessed Abraham in verse 17, “blessing I will bless you, and multiplying I will multiply your descendants as the starts of the heaven and as the sand which is on the seashore; and your descendants shall possess the gate of their enemies. In your seed all the nations oaf the earth shall be blessed because you have obeyed My voice.”  Now this promise is priceless.  All of my children will have children, including Lydia!!!  And the enemy who engages them in battle should beware because they have been given the gates to their enemies!! 🙂

Tonight as Lydia I were preparing to pray we went over God’s perfect plan of providing the cord blood for her body to thrive.  I reminded her that we didn’t pray for a specific person by name but for the perfect match that her body would receive and that would graft to her body giving her “the more abundant live” that Jesus died to give her (James 10:10).  So their was little concern when the children were not a match and again when none of the ‘chosen’ donors worked out because we prayed God would provide the perfect donor that would cause her body to thrive, grafting to her body and her body receiving it without a problem.  As I was saying that “we prayed God would provide,” I nearly jumped off the bed with joy!!!  Abraham named the place The-Lord-Will-Provide!!  Ha!  It fits.  It all fits.  It was like digging in a gold mine and we came out with the riches of heaven!!

SO…tomorrow at 9:30 am, we celebrate as Lydia receives her bone marrow transplant by way of cord blood because The-Lord-Will-Provide!!!

Loving Jesus and taking the gates of my enemies!  Day 3 of the ATGAM is finished and Lydia has ZERO reaction to it today!!!  Thank you Jesus! And tomorrow we climb the mountain and see that God has provided!  This place will be a place where the Lord will provide for others!!!  They will get peace, joy, and love from the Father as they see Him provide when there was no other way!!! Amen!

Thankfully I know I will get an A on this test because God is in control and always leads me into triumph!  I will sit, take and turn in the test and Jesus gives me all the right answers for an A!


Read Full Post »